Therapy for Religious Trauma

Religious trauma can feel like an uninvited guest that shows up in every corner of your life. Maybe you’ve felt its presence when questioning your self-worth, navigating relationships, or even deciding whether you deserve joy. For many, the messages they’ve received from rigid religious systems or spiritually abusive environments stick around long after they’ve left those spaces, shaping how they see themselves and the world.

And yet, here you are. Whether you’re ex-clergy trying to rebuild a life outside of your role, someone who left a faith community and wonders if it “counts” as trauma, or simply someone who feels disconnected from their spiritual self, you’ve already taken a courageous step forward. Truly, kudos to you. You don’t have to figure this out alone.

What is Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma isn’t always a dramatic, one-time event. Sometimes, it’s the slow accumulation of messages about who you’re supposed to be, what you’re supposed to do, and what makes you worthy. Maybe you were told you were sinful, broken, or unworthy unless you followed a specific path. Maybe you were punished—physically, emotionally, or socially—for questioning authority or stepping out of line. Or perhaps the expectations placed on you as a member of the clergy or faith community left you burned out and isolated.

Ask yourself:

Have I ever felt like I wasn’t allowed to question or challenge religious teachings?

Do I carry feelings of shame or guilt that I can’t seem to shake, even after leaving a faith community?

Do I feel stuck between what I was taught to believe and what feels true to me now?

If any of this resonates, it’s worth exploring. Religious trauma might look different for everyone, but its impact is very real.

Does my trauma count?

One of the most common things I hear from clients dealing with religious trauma is, “I don’t know if my experience was bad enough to count as trauma.” Let me be clear: If something hurt you, it matters. Religious trauma doesn’t require a headline-worthy event. It can stem from years of subtle, insidious messages about your worth, your identity, or your relationships.

For ex-clergy, the transition out of a religious role can feel particularly disorienting. Maybe you gave everything to your faith community, only to feel abandoned or lost when you stepped away. Or maybe you’re grappling with how to navigate life without the structure and identity that role provided. Whatever your story, your pain is valid, and it’s worthy of attention.

Shame is a lie someone told you about yourself.

-Nikki Giovanni

Rebuild After Religious Trauma

The good news? Healing is possible. It’s not about erasing the past but about reclaiming your power and deciding what kind of life you want to build moving forward. Together, we can:

Untangle Harmful Beliefs: What messages from your past are still holding you back? Let’s identify and challenge those narratives, replacing them with ones that reflect your truth and values.

Reconnect with Yourself: Trauma has a way of disconnecting us from our own inner wisdom. Through therapy, we’ll work on rebuilding trust in yourself and your ability to make decisions that align with who you are.

Explore Spirituality on Your Terms: Whether you want to rediscover spirituality or move away from it entirely, this process is about finding what feels authentic to you. There’s no “right” way to approach this—only what works for you.

We’ll ask the right questions.

Sometimes, the first step to healing is asking the right questions. Here are a few to reflect on:

What messages about myself have I carried from my religious upbringing, and do they still serve me?

What does it mean to me to live a good or meaningful life outside of those teachings?

What would it feel like to explore spirituality or meaning without fear or judgment?

How can I create relationships that support and affirm who I am today?

These aren’t easy questions, but they can open the door to deeper understanding and growth.

My Work with Ex-Clergy

Leaving a role in the clergy can feel like stepping into a completely new world. For years, your identity may have been tied to your spiritual leadership, your community, and the expectations placed on you. Now, you might be wondering: Who am I without this role? How do I navigate a world that feels so different from the one I left?

In therapy we can explore how to

Reclaiming Your Identity: You’re more than your role. Let’s discover the parts of you that were overshadowed by expectations and give them room to grow.

Navigating Relationships: Transitioning out of a faith community can strain relationships with friends, family, and former colleagues. Together, we’ll explore how to navigate these dynamics with honesty and grace.

Finding New Purpose: Leaving the clergy doesn’t mean leaving behind your desire to contribute or create meaning. We’ll work on discovering what purpose looks like for you now.

May you have the
courage to listen to
the voice of desire that
disturbs you when you
have settled for
something safe.

-John O’Donohue

Ready to get started?

You don’t have to do this alone. Whether you’re unpacking years of harmful teachings, navigating life after the clergy, or simply exploring what it means to live without shame, therapy can provide the support and tools you need. Together, we’ll create a space where you can heal, grow, and reclaim the life you deserve.

Let’s take this journey together. One step at a time, we’ll uncover the freedom and fulfillment that’s been waiting for you all along.